These Are My Confessions

I have a confession to make.

Sometimes I am not perfect. (ha! Shocker, right?)

But, really.  There are a lot of things I don’t share on this blog because they don’t fit into this image I’ve created for myself here.  And I don’t like that.

I have flaws, and I eat crap, and I overeat.  Or sometimes it goes the opposite way, and I just don’t eat.  And I hate that about myself.  I wish I was a perfect vision of health all.the.time. But I’m simply not.  It’s cyclical.  Most times I am happily plugging along, and then some event – a test, or a fight, or even worse, shark week – comes along, and it’s like everything just gets tossed up in the air.  It’s a tough spot to be in.  I tell my clients at the gym to eat a certain way, I talk about good nutrition and health all day at school, I post blogs and tweet about it, and sometimes I am the one completely failing at being that perfect little health blogger.  I feel like such a hypocrite.

I don’t want to have to hide these things on my blog.  I want to share my struggles.  And sometimes I want to have selfish moments and just talk about myself and how I’m feeling.  Like right now…  Is that so bad?  I say no.  Hell, it’s my blog.

So right now?  I am mad at myself for not working out consistently over the past few days.  I am PO’d that I let myself mindless eat peanut butter while watching The Bachelor last night, simply because it was National Peanut Butter Day. And worst of all, I am disappointed that I have been hiding all this simply because it did not match the persona of a perfect healthy living blogger that I’ve been comparing myself to.

The good thing about all this, is that I know I have the tools to get myself back on track.  I know I won’t be out in this unhealthy limbo land for too long.  And hopefully, if I stop keeping secrets on here, I will be able to to make the transition back on the healthy path a little bit quicker.

 

Hopefully you won’t mind if I’m a little bit more open on here, yo.

So for today, I am going to suppress my crazy RIT student self, and make sure I at least let myself step away from the case studies and studying for Friday’s MNT midterm to get a workout in and eat well.  School can wait for health.

Here’s to wellness!